Crossing Over

Willie has an appointment with a big-shot film producer (Richard Masur), on the eve of his 21st birthday; then, he and Doug make friends with a stripper (Shera Danese).

Written by David Jacobs; produced by Nigel McKeand; directed by Edward Parone. Shera Danese: Bambi. James Canning: delivery boy. Richard Masur: producer.

Producer (on the phone): Carla, sweetie. Call Mr. Dale, tell him I'll be a little late. I don't care how important he is. In... no more than five minutes. [hangs up] Tell me.
Willie: What -- in no more than five minutes? I...
Producer: In one sentence.
Willie: In a sentence? Well, I... don't think I can tell you in a sentence.
Producer: Sure you can. Listen: "Shark terrorizes resort community." Uno sentence.
Willie: But...
Producer: Write this down. [Willie fumbles in his pockets] Great, great, a writer without a pen. [hands him one] Keep it. [dictates] One sentence says it.
Willie: That's it?
Producer: Listen to the voice of experience, kid. How old are you?
Willie: Twenty.
Producer: Twenty-what?
Willie: Just twenty.
Producer: My point is made. Go home, work out that love story very, very carefully; when you've got your sentence, gimme a call. Later.
Doug: How does it feel to be turning 21?
Willie: Just terrific. I couldn't stand another day of childhood.
Doug: I mean, aside from the bad interview.
Willie: Dad, the best present you could give me would be to ignore this birthday... please.
[camera slowly zooms in on corner of typewriter-shaped cake]
Buddy: You ate the Z!
Nancy: No, I didn't.
Buddy (indignantly): The Z was here this afternoon!
Nancy: All I ate was this little piece that was stuck to the inside, I went like this and...
Buddy: Aha. The Z.
Nancy: Well, I didn't mean to eat the Z. I didn't do it on purpose.
Buddy: I bet. I bet. How was it?
Nancy: Oh, it was...
Buddy: Come on, Nancy!
Nancy: Well, we're not celebrating a birthday --
Buddy: Leave the cake alone. [storms off upstairs]
Nancy (looking at the cake longingly): Some zealot would miss the backspace...
Doug: I can tell you when I first realized how different he was.
Bambi: Different? Willie's not different! You should see some of the weirdos I know. Talk about different!
Doug: I didn't mean that kind of different. I meant, different from me. We went to the World's Fair, Montreal. You know, Expo '67?
Bambi: Sure.
Doug: We saw all the pavilions -- you know, Yugoslavia, and Czechoslovakia, and Poland... And Willie said: "I wanna see the Transylvania pavilion."
Bambi: Like, Dracula's hangout?
Doug: Uh-huh. He wanted to see it. And I explained that Transylvania is a region, it's not a country. He said, "Well, it should have its own pavilion." And he went on to describe just what it would look like, very seriously.
Bambi: How old was he?
Doug: Ten. He said, "It would have models of castles, long staircases, an exhibition of products from the country -- men's formal wear, ladies' sleepwear, large tubes of toothpaste, special toothbrushes with bristles for fangs..."